What is Coaching?
The International Coaching Federation defines coaching as partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential. The process of coaching
Friends can be a wonderful source of wisdom and support. At the same time, only you know truly what is best for you, and a coach will respect this fact. Our friends often think they know what is best for us, and they may even have a personal agenda. For example, if you are thinking of moving away, a close friend who would prefer you to stay nearby may not always offer the advice that could be most helpful for you.
Which brings me to another difference: usually, coaches do not give advice. I believe that every client I work with already has all of the knowledge and experience necessary to make the best plans and choices for themselves. I will only offer advice if my client requests that I do so. Occasionally I might come up with an idea, but I will only share that after asking your permission to do so. As your coach, rather than your friend.
I have no expectations, and I will never pressure you or bring my own wishes for you. I want the best for you, of course, but from a neutral position, and on your own terms: I truly have no ‘skin in the game’. As you may be realising, a coach brings a very different perspective from that of a close friend. The coaching relationship is a uniquely neutral and supportive one.
Another key difference is that in a coaching session we will focus entirely on your own concerns. Quite rightly, friendship is reciprocal, and a good friend knows that they can talk about their own problems and preoccupations and receive a sympathetic hearing from you. Indeed, they may well bring this expectation of reciprocity to every exchange you have with them. By contrast, in a contracted coaching session the time is all yours, of course.
As your coach, I will never mention my own challenges or expect you to help me with those. From time to time I might share a brief example from my own life experience that I think might help shed some light on your own situation, but that is as much about me as you are ever likely to hear. In a coaching session we will focus on your topic, and on finding solutions to and strategies for this, for the entire 60 minutes. Coaching is highly time-efficient: you can expect tangible results, in terms of an action plan, at the conclusion of every session.
I believe that every client I work with already has all of the knowledge and experience necessary to make the best plans and choices for themselves
Finally, the intentionality of coaching itself can yield surprising results. We cannot always plan when and how we will speak with a friend, and even if we do succeed in arranging a meeting with them, there is no guarantee that most of this time will not be taken up with their own concerns. When you are contracted for coaching, the reflection and preparation time in between sessions can be as productive as the sessions themselves. When you know you have a coaching coming up, then the mental processes in terms of preparation and identifying a clear topic for this can be constructive already: you will probably spend time identifying and prioritising plans, problems, and decisions more explicitly for yourself than you may do in regular, ‘uncoached’ time when the pressing claims of work and family life are claiming most of your attention. Additionally, in relation to your action plan points, the fact that you know you will be meeting with your coach in x number of days can be very helpful in nudging you to put those intentions into practice. Partnering with a coach is an astonishingly effective way to ensure that the proportion of your own intentions that translate into action will increase exponentially. It might even mean that you end up finding more time to chat with your good friends, if that happens to be one of your priorities.
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The International Coaching Federation defines coaching as partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential. The process of coaching
Most often, a performance coaching program takes place over a series of 6 – 10 sessions, although sometimes one session may be enough to prepare you for a specific event,